Today was not a great day for me, unfortunately, for a variety of reasons. Feel free to email me if you want to know why.
In any event, it turned out that I had the house to myself tonight, and I was determined to relax and enjoy one of my favorite shows, “Stargate: Atlantis,” on the SCI-FI channel, with some Goldfish crackers and a glass of pinot grigiot.
For this rant to make sense, you should know that SCI-FI is owned by NBC-Universal, a network I have grown to hate over the last couple of years, despite being home to three of my most favorite shows ever, “30 Rock”; “Battlestar Galactica”; and, of course, “Stargate.” First they leave the iTunes store, then the “30 Rock” fiasco, and now this.
I had forgotten that this is “Green Week” on NBC. Last year at this time, NBC forced its shows to write scripts about global warming and such. Thus “30 Rock” had one of its weakest … no, that’s not fair: THE WEAKEST … episode staring that idiot who played Ross on “Friends” as an out-of-control corporate environmental mascot.
Well, they did it to me again. Tonight’s “Stargate” is so wretchedly heavily handed I want to vomit. This is EASILY the WORST EPISODE ever. The script is literally laughable, which is unique for what is normally a very intelligent and fun show.
Suffice it to say the “plot” (if you can call it that) revolves around a machine designed to solve global warming which goes awry. A collection of geniuses — including, for Christ’s sake, Bill Nye the Science Guy — have to solve the problem. They argue. The Dr. Keller character then chastises them and warns them that they have to save the planet.
[Oh my God, Nye is shouting his dialogue as I write!!!]
G– damn you, NBC.
Right now I hate you worse that Thomas Kinkade, the Painter of Light.™
No, strike that. I HATE YOU MORE THAN I HATE GEORGE W. BUSH!